Inside the underground MDMA couples' therapy boom

🌈 Abstract

The article explores the use of MDMA (ecstasy) in couples therapy, discussing the experiences of various couples who have used the drug to improve their relationships. It covers the legal status of MDMA therapy, the science behind its effects, and the challenges and risks involved in using it without professional guidance.

🙋 Q&A

[01] Charles and Shelley Wininger's Experience

1. What led Charles and Shelley Wininger to start using MDMA together?

• They were both recovering from the disorienting experience of divorce when they met at a seminar in 2000.
• They wanted to hold onto the "first rushes of a relationship" and maintain a sense of openness and connection, so they began taking MDMA together a few years into their relationship.

2. How has MDMA affected their relationship over the years?

• MDMA has helped them have "gratitude and appreciation for each other and life", and the problems they face "pale in comparison to this context".
• They have taken MDMA around 90 times over the years, a handful of times per year, to reconnect and envision their relationship's past, present, and future.

3. What is Charles Wininger's professional view on the use of MDMA in couples therapy?

• As a couples therapist, Charles believes MDMA can be "emotional superglue" for relationships, helping couples reconnect in a way they haven't in years or decades.
• He likens the experience to taking a "helicopter ride over your life together" and deciding how to navigate forward.

[02] Kip and David's Experience

1. How did Kip and his previous partner first start using MDMA together?

• Kip's previous partner had experience with MDMA and suggested they try it together to help with Kip's chronic PTSD.
• They read a guide on MDMA-assisted therapy published by MAPS (Multidisciplinary Association for Psychedelic Studies) and did some preparation before their first session.

2. How do Kip and his current partner David approach their MDMA sessions?

• They spend the week before the session preparing by journaling, and the day before they set up a comfortable, intentional space at home.
• During the session, they share personal intentions, take turns talking through their issues, and try to maintain focus on their objectives.

3. What realizations did Kip have during one of his MDMA sessions with David?

• Kip realized that his aversion to David's fidgeting was due to a deep attachment wound from his father's similar behavior when angry.
• Being able to let go of this issue during the MDMA session was "really incredible" for Kip.

[03] The Science and Legality of MDMA Therapy

1. What are the key effects of MDMA that make it useful in couples therapy?

• MDMA reduces anger and increases empathy, allowing people to "engage with the other person's thought process".
• It also helps access and process repressed emotions without becoming overwhelmed.

2. What is the importance of the "integration" process after taking MDMA?

• The critical window of neuroplasticity after taking MDMA allows the brain to change and adapt.
• Psychedelic integration helps process the emotions and experiences brought up during the MDMA session and implement them into daily life.

3. What is the current legal status of MDMA therapy, and what are the challenges around it?

• The use of MDMA in therapeutic settings is currently illegal in the US and most of Europe, though the FDA is expected to decide on approving it for PTSD treatment by August 11.
• The lack of regulation has led to an underground boom of couples trying MDMA-assisted therapy on their own, which can be risky without professional guidance.