Confessions of a Luxury-Wedding Planner - The Atlantic

🌈 Abstract

The article provides an insider's perspective on the world of luxury wedding planning, exploring the extravagance, challenges, and emotional complexities involved in catering to the ultra-wealthy. It delves into the evolution of weddings as a competitive social media spectacle, the astronomical costs of high-end events, and the personal and professional experiences of a former luxury wedding planner.

🙋 Q&A

[01] Sunday Mornings for Wedding Planners

1. What do wedding planners do on Sunday mornings? Wedding planners use Sunday mornings to pray, as this is when clients who were married the previous day decide if they are happy or not and whom to blame.

2. What types of emails do wedding planners receive on Mondays? Wedding planners may receive emails on Mondays that are either full of joy and praise or complaints from unhappy clients.

3. What is the main job of a luxury wedding planner? The main job of a luxury wedding planner is to be a "professional wedding friend" - caring about the details that the couple and their family care about, even if others no longer want to discuss them.

[02] The Rise of Weddings as a Competitive Social Media Spectacle

1. How did the online community of "Knotties" on The Knot transform weddings? The Knot's online community of brides-to-be, the "Knotties", created a sense of competition and one-upmanship around weddings, as brides shared photos and ideas, inspiring others to try to outdo them.

2. How has the rise of social media impacted the way couples plan their weddings? Couples now plan their weddings with an eye towards how the event will be perceived and shared on social media, hiring professional "wedding social media advisers" to strategize and manage the online presence of their wedding.

3. What percentage of couples report taking on debt to pay for their weddings? Surveys have found that roughly 30 to 45 percent of couples report taking on credit-card or other debt to pay for their weddings.

[03] The Extravagance of Luxury Weddings

1. What are some examples of the extreme luxuries included in high-end weddings? Examples include building a miniature golf course on a private estate, employing dozens of vendors and hundreds of workers, and hiring professional dressers to assist the bride.

2. What are some of the most expensive aspects of planning a luxury wedding? The most expensive aspects are the infrastructure required, such as landscaping, electrical work, tents, lighting, restrooms, catering facilities, and weather monitoring services.

3. How much do some of the top wedding planners and vendors charge for their services? Top wedding planners like Marcy Blum can charge $2-3 million for a wedding, while high-end caterers like Michael Waiser start at around $550 per person, and photographers like Allan Zepeda charge a minimum of $50,000.

[04] The Emotional Complexities of Wedding Planning

1. What were some of the personal challenges the author faced as a wedding planner? The author struggled with having to maintain a positive, enthusiastic persona for clients even when dealing with personal issues, and found it difficult to quit working with brides who were abusive or taking advantage of her.

2. What was the author's experience with the "fake poor" bride and her wealthy mother? The author was hired by the wealthy mother to secretly upgrade the "fake poor" bride's budget-conscious wedding, leading to an elaborate ruse and eventual confrontation when the bride discovered the deception.

3. How did the author feel about not being able to be fully honest with clients whose views she disagreed with? The author felt conflicted about having to go along with clients' views, such as their support for Donald Trump, without being able to voice her own opposing opinions as their hired "wedding friend".