Beyond peace and quiet: The story of an addiction to silence

🌈 Abstract

The article discusses the author's journey towards embracing silence and solitude, and her reflections on the nature and importance of silence in modern life.

🙋 Q&A

[01] The Noisy Life

1. What were the author's experiences with noise and lack of silence in her early life?

• The author was born into a large, sociable family where introspection and solitude were not allowed.
• She was then sent to a boarding school where there was constant noise and no privacy.
• Later, as a married Anglican vicar's wife, she lived in a noisy vicarage that was never empty or silent.

2. How did the author's perspective on silence change over time?

• In the late 1980s, the author's marriage ended and she found herself living alone for the first time, in a small village.
• She discovered the "silent joy of gardening" and began exploring meditation and contemplative prayer.
• The author became increasingly interested in silence itself, seeing it not as an absence but as a "rich space" with an "interior dimension."

[02] Seeking Silence

1. Why did the author decide to move to a remote location to live a life centered on silence?

• The author felt that village life, although peaceful, was not truly silent, as she was still known and involved with the community.
• She was inspired by accounts of others who had sought out extreme solitude, like the polar explorer Richard Byrd.
• The author described herself as "falling in love with silence" and wanted to immerse herself in it more deeply.

2. What challenges did the author face in trying to live a life of silence?

• Even in the remote locations she chose, the author found it difficult to escape the intrusions of modern life, such as phone calls, visitors, and the need to run errands.
• She realized that it was impossible to be completely free of "familiar habits and urgencies" like the need to earn a living and maintain relationships.

[03] Experiences of Silence

1. What were some of the author's notable experiences during her extended periods of silence?

• She experienced an intensification of physical sensations and heightened emotions during her time in isolation.
• She reported hearing voices and having experiences that blurred the line between her inner and outer reality.
• The author had a powerful sense of connection with the natural world during a walk in the mountains, feeling a "oneness" with the landscape.

2. How did the author's perspective on silence evolve over time?

• The author realized that silence is not a "monotone" or undifferentiated experience, but can be "calm or frightening, lonely or joyful, deep or thin."
• She came to see silence not as an absence, but as a "whole world in and of itself, alongside language and culture, but independent of it."

[04] Creating a Life of Silence

1. What steps did the author take to create a more silent life for herself?

• She got rid of noise-making devices like TVs, radios, and even her car radio.
• She found ways to minimize intrusions and interruptions, such as using email and online shopping.
• The author eventually purchased a remote, derelict shepherd's house in the Scottish Borders to serve as her "hermitage."

2. How does the author balance her desire for silence with the need for some social interaction?

• The author aims to have 80% of her life be silent, unplugging from the phone and internet for two days a week.
• She limits her social activities to a maximum of six days per month, but acknowledges that unexpected events can disrupt this.
• The author sees silence as a "whole world" that exists alongside language and culture, and she tries to find the right balance between the two.